Drama Ensues After Woman Finds Out How Husband Refers to His Late Wife

I was extensively quoted in the article below. Scroll for excerpt. You can read the entire Bored Panda article here.

Excerpt:

Relationship coach and the expert on dating and marrying a widower Abel Keogh says that calling his late spouse “my wife” implies that he’s still married to the deceased person. “If a widower is going to mention their deceased spouse, they should use that person’s first name or they should say ‘late wife’ to clarify that they’re talking about a deceased individual,” he explains.

“Using the term ‘my wife’ in conversation often causes confusion and resentment,” he notes. “If the widower is with his new girlfriend and begins using the term ‘my wife,’ those he’s talking to might think he’s talking about the girlfriend instead of his deceased spouse.”

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“The new spouse has NO obligation to uphold the memory of the late wife,” he emphasizes. “They can do so if they choose, but upholding a memory of the late wife usually makes the living wife feel like second best.”

Read whole article here.

RIP Gracie

RIP Gracie. You ran until you couldn’t. Thanks for the miles and memories. Will take a long run with you again in the next life.

The Golden Bachelor Gets Divorced after 3 Months of Marriage. What Can You Learn from It?

In case you haven’t heard, “The Golden Bachelor” is getting a divorce. The couple announced on TV (of course) that they came to the conclusion it was time to “dissolve” their relationship after being married for just 3 months. According to news reports, the decision was linked to the inability of couple to decide how to merge their lives. Apparently, part of it was they could never reach an agreement on where to live. (The wife lives in New Jersey while the GB resides in Indiana.)

While their divorce may come as a sad surprise to many, the truth is if you don’t have big issues resolved—like where to live—before tying the knot your marriage is going to go down in flames. Divorce rates for second marriages but esp. for widows and widowers is extremely high in part because big decisions and dealbreakers aren’t discussed and sorted out before saying “I Do!”. If you’ve ever taken a coaching session from me or read one of my books, you’ll know that I stress knowing your dealbreakers and what you can and can’t live with BEFORE getting serious with someone.

Alas, it’s too late for this couple, but be ye not so stupid. In any case I wish the Golden Bachelor and his soon-to-be ex-wife all the luck and success going forward and may everyone else learn an important lesson as you look for love.